How We Got Here...
by Gregg Landsman
Summary: Gohan lies awake at night and starts wondering things...


Dragon Ball Z and all associated characters are the property of Akira Toriyama. Or, at least, should be. Damn corporates.

This is a slightly weird one. It's Gohan's perspective on certain matters, after Buu saga.

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How We Got Here…

I'm lying in bed, having just made love for the third time in my life. And now I'm coming to certain conclusions, although I don't know how…

Oh. I'm getting ahead of myself.

My name is Son Gohan. I'm a graduate college student right now. I have a girlfriend. I have a pretty good life, all in all.

And oh, yeah, I'm the ki equivalent to a thermonuclear bomb.

Bet you never saw that one coming, did you?

I'm lying here in bed, Videl is sleeping next to me, and for some reason I can't sleep. Why? Because I tend to just lie awake and wonder all the time. Mom was always worried that I wouldn't be intellectual. But I'd give Confucius a run for his money at this point.

I'm lying here in bed and staring up at the ceiling of the bedroom. Videl is softly snorting and leaning against me.

And I'm wondering what everyone else is doing.

Dad and Mom are no doubt asleep at this point. Goten, my kid brother, is probably snoring like a chainsaw.

Krillin is probably snoring away, so is 18. But why am I thinking about this?

I've just decided to give up fighting. I've realized I've got better things to look forward to, but I said I'd be there if they needed backup. Was I being selfish? No, maybe a bit more realistic. And also playing peacemaker.

Mom always worried about me being the hero. But I always worried because my power was uncontrollable. I could level cities, mountains, planets, entire solar systems.

I knocked Radditz for a loop when he threatened my father. I beat Vegeta senseless when I was forced to ascend into my Oozaro form. I beat Freeza to an inch of his life when he nearly killed Krillin. I murdered two of the Spice Boys with a single blast.

And then…came Cell.

A being who's level of power I couldn't help but completely, utterly fear. A complete, absolute bastard who only lived to inflict pain and fear and suffering and prove that he was better than everyone else. If only so you'd suffer under him. He was just pure, identifiable evil.

He destroyed cities, islands, ready to destroy the planet to make you realize he was better than you.

He inherited genes from Vegeta, Dad, Krillin, Tien, and Freeza.

But most definitely Freeza.

I was forced to fight him. But I hate fighting. I can't stand drawing blood. I begged him to stop, to just surrender so I didn't have to kill him.

And so Cell simply viciously attacked me. Then spawned those creatures and attacked my friends…

And then I snapped.

Do you know what rage is?

Rage is a simple, singular sense of being. The stopping of your heart when it begins, the pounding when it boils over.

I never felt rage like I did that day.

I watched in horror and disgust when Cell crushed the head of Android 16 after 16 told me that I didn't need to hold back.

And then Cell looked at me, grinned, and said those words I remember to this day:

"Yet another fighter who's life you could have saved."

And then I snapped.

I felt power life you would never even be able to believe. Becoming a Super Saiyan requires oneness. Purity of one emotion.

For my father, it was pure anger at Freeza killing his best friend, Krillin. For Vegeta it was the pure disdain he felt for himself and his power. For Trunks of the future, it was pure grief from my…death.

And for me it was pure pity for myself, realizing I was the third wheel of our fighting troupe.

And when I saw Cell crush that head, and mock me…I felt pure, unbridled rage. And my power was focused.

Did I ever tell you I destroyed a comet with one single blast? It was called the Makio star. It was a source of power for Garlic jr. And I destroyed it with a single rage-powered blast.

My power was focused. They told me I reached the second true level of being a Super Saiyan. To use an old slang term, I beat Cell like a red-headed stepchild. For a while at least, and then…

Well, I don't want to talk about what happened, then.

They say it's natural for a son to outlive his father. But how natural is it for the son to outlive the father on three separate occasions?

When you look at it, out of all of the Z-warriors, I'm the only one still on his first body. That's saying something.

But then there's other things.

Do you want to know what I realized, a week ago?

Becoming a Super Saiyan is the ki equivalent of an orgasm.

I'm serious. The ascension into that new power is the ki equivalent of sexual climax. The training is foreplay, getting you ready. The powering up is the actual intercourse. Finding the right ways, knowing what buttons to push, building up towards the end.

And then, finally, you become a Super Saiyan, and you just feel…everything. Like someone just gave you a full dose of every single emotion, of every single feeling at once. You don't see it the first time because you have to be purely one emotion. But when I did it other times, I was just overcome by how it felt.

I didn't realize it the first time Videl and I made love because, well…it wasn't exactly spectacular. It was late, we were more than a little drunk, and…well…we both enjoyed it mainly because it wasn't the action, but the partner.

The second time, I realized it. Videl could give lessons to a nymph, let me tell you…or, wait, why should I be saying this? Well, let me sum it up…that time, I got a similar reaction.

I've never told anyone about this little realization. I doubt Vegeta would ever really care. Trunks is still much too young, Krillin would laugh his cue-ball head off, Tien is probably a virgin and Yamcha would just sulk.

And how would I tell Dad, of all people? It's DAD, we're talking about.

And Mom wouldn't exactly react favorably to the realization that her little boy was getting off at the age of 11 years. Oh, joy.

Ah…but, when you look at it, I'm lucky.

I have a great family.

My Dad, outside of a fight, might be kinda dumb, but he puts his heart into everything. He loves me, he loves Mom, and he loves Goten.

I still remember the time we spent in the Hyperbolic Time Chamber. Just the two of us, training and bonding. Both he and Mom always looked out for me, wanted the best for me. Mom wanted me to be a genius(which I am, really. I tested really high on IQ tests), Dad wanted me to be a fighter.

But I remember what Dad told me when I told him I couldn't be a fighter anymore.

"It's okay, son," he said, "When I was pushing you, I just wanted you to get control. It was never because I wanted you to be me, it was because I wanted you to know what you can do, and control it."

He wanted me to have control. He wanted me to be able to tap my massive power and use it in not just planet destroying rage, but with complete utter control. I told him about my exploits as the Great Saiyaman, and he laughed and told me that that was what he always wanted to do.

It's kinda odd, really. My Dad, me, my friends…we're superheroes. We saved the Earth on a regular basis.

Hell, I saved the Earth. Twice.

And my Dad told me it was fine by him when I told him I wanted to be a normal student from here on in. He said it was alright with him. That I finally had the self control I needed to help him if I ever felt I needed to. But now, now that he can become a level 3 Super Saiyan, Dad thinks he's got that role down pat.

It's what I tell people whenever they ask me about my Dad, Son Goku.

I simply tell them that I've got a great Dad.

Wonderful.

Now I have something I'll immediately compare myself to if Videl and I ever get married and have kids.

Thanks, Dad.


End file.
